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  1. My Alien Self: My Journey Back to Me
  2. Are Aliens Real? Can Aliens Communicate With You in Your Dreams?
  3. Why I left the Border Patrol to study UFOs
  4. I used Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) to my advantage – despite its debilitating effects
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My Alien Self: My Journey Back to Me

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Are Aliens Real? Can Aliens Communicate With You in Your Dreams?

Bionic Book Worm. Polarized Mind welcome to my whimsical and wacky world. The interesting part was that as I was transported to this plane of consciousness, I was no longer aware of the world around me.

Everyone in that room disappeared. The crazy mad-house became still, and silence was all around me. I could hear nothing and no one. The Icaro songs had vanished into the air. I did not even have the sensation of being in the maloca anymore. I do not know where I was or if I even left. Physically I was lying on the floor mattress, but I was elevated in the air. I was floating up in the ceiling of the maloca, and I could see everyone below me.


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Wow, what a strange feeling!. I flew higher to the point I was now outside the maloca, and the sky was covered in stars. I stood there in the middle of this immensity, being one with Ayahuasca and the universe. As my journey with Ayahuasca continues, so did my visions. Ayahuasca gave me a glimpse of my life: past, present, and future, but they were all interrelated. One did not end for the other to start. It was as though we live all three tenses simultaneously. I was transported to a very bright state of consciousness.

It was neither bright like the sun, nor bright like electric light. It is a type of brightness I have never seen, so it is hard for me to put into words. The closest description I can think of is celestial. Ayahuasca made me feel I was incredibly blessed and protected.

Why I left the Border Patrol to study UFOs

I could feel in every fiber and cell of my body I was loved and cared for. No matter what would come my way, she made it clear; I was never going to be alone. Ayahuasca flashed in front of me the people that love me. Those who were my tribe.

Stigma Fighters: Amanda Green

I saw my children and the love was immense. I even saw my staff, my pets and felt the love of my mother come through so strong. A side note for those of you who did not read my blog: In the Midst of Loss, I Found Love , I had spent my whole childhood and adult life feeling that mother did not love me.

She was clear in showing and making me feel through thousands of miles away, that my mother did love me and loved me powerfully and protectively. There was no question in my mind. Ayahuasca was releasing a heavy burden I had carried with me for a long time. I then saw my family and their love for me. I saw my ex-husband, Jeffrey as my protector. Again it is hard for me to describe to you how I knew what each person represented or gave me, but at the moment of the vision, there was no question.

I knew intuitively that Jeffrey was there to protect me always. Ayahuasca showed me living in a home that was full of love and laughter. I was surrounded by the familiar faces of my closest girlfriends, my sisters since I never had any of my own. I was shown I was never alone nor ever to fear loneliness as that was never going to be the emotion governing my soul. I was then transported to a green field. Wow, it was infinite, all green pastures and I could not see where the pastures began or ended. In the middle of the field was this little girl with a head full of tight curls.

It was my older daughter Victoria. The strange thing is that I could see every hair particle in her chubby arms and I could even see all of her skin cells. I saw her long legs with short blue jean and her thick hair blowing in the wind. I remember saying out loud,. Not sure why, even to this day, but I was fixated on her long silky hair. The feeling of gratitude and pride was suffocating. I began to sob so hard I could not breathe. Suddenly, I was not in the green pastures anymore. I felt someone tugging at my leg, and when I looked down, it was my daughter, Emma, as a baby, with her bald blond head with thin hairs.

Emma was wearing a diaper and smiling at me to pick her up. I do not know how long this vision lasted, but all I felt was love. Ayahuasca showed me I have always been blessed and loved at all points in my life. She showed me that love was the only emotion that governed my life and there was nothing else I needed to see or want. I am not sure how I got back to my body or whether I ever left. All I know is that I was awaken by the candles that were relit and the Shaman announcing that the ceremony had concluded.

We were told to continue to relax on our mats and were welcomed to stay for as long as we needed. We could go back to our rooms before midnight or depend on how we felt we could sleep in the maloca. I felt great after I awoke.

I used Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) to my advantage – despite its debilitating effects

I opted to go back to my room. When I left the Maloca, it was close to midnight. I am not sure if it was that I was still under the effects of Ayahuasca or that it indeed happened, but I witnessed the most amazing rain shower of shooting stars. I have seen a few shooting stars in my life, but nothing has come close to what I witnessed that night. The stars were huge and felt so close to me. Someone said it was because we were close to the equator, but it was one after another, shooting down, lighting the sky.

Author Amanda Green's nine fantastic books :-)

I think I counted 18 of them. It was like a miracle. At the end of each ceremony, you feel relief that you made it from hell and back. Honestly, that is the feeling you get. Especially for some people more than others. Ayahuasca was indeed a profound experience for me. I do feel fortunate that I did not see the terrifying things some people see.

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I did not die as many relate nor did I see demonic elements in any of my times with Ayahuasca. I experienced fear, yes, but fear of the unknown. Once I fully emerged in the world of Ayahuasca, I had the most love-filled, blissful experience of my life. I felt a depth of completeness in my soul and compassion of who I truly am.

Sadly, I lack the words to make justice to you to the degree that I possess no words in my vocabulary to adequately describe what I saw and felt. I have to confess. However, it does not matter how your night with Ayahuasca goes. For me, it was still a difficult process. Even though my Shaman gave me low doses, it still took everything from me to do it. It is as if you have given birth without an epidural each time.